It's Kind Of A Funny Story

I watch the above movie and it was pretty slow, but I still liked it. I mostly just liked the end because I actually got something form it which sort of matches what I've been thinking of all day. The movie talked about living life regret free, fear free, and in total thankfulness. And today I have been thinking about how your with growing closer to God or away from him and a little while ago those 2 things matched but now I forgot how haha I guess I just trying to say that I need to use my time better. I feel kind of boring and I want to live; idk if that's volunteer in soup kitchens or just take more risks when they come along. All I know is that right now, I want to live to the fullest and I feel my life is less full than full. Did that make any sense? Anybody have any fun ideas to add excitement to my life?

LORD, I mess up some times. I fall short. And God, I'm so humbled because your forgiveness is never far away. "Forgive us our sins as we forgive those that have sinned against us" God your forgiveness is my favorite characteristic of yours because that's something I'm so bad at. It is way easier to hold it against someone. But God, I get mad when friends hurt me, but then I remember how ofter I hurt you. I'm so humbled because your forgiveness is never far away.

Macklemore X Ryan Lewis - Can't Hold Us Feat. Ray Dalton

It's go time for me and just about every other college student. I have four finals, two of which are going to kill me. But today, today is a good day. I know I have to study a ton tonight but that just makes free time so much better. So I'll listen to some tunes, joke with my friends, read some Bible, play some soccer and write a blog post. Find your playlist and happy studying :)

I had a dream last night

Someone asked me who I was

life as a sophomore

I just tried to write a fun blog post that would capture your attention like your favorite movie. That didn't happen. The point I was trying to get at however, is that God, and all the attributes that go with him, have been apparent to me. When all else got wrong, God's love never fails :) das it ppl. Get out there and love.

Today was a good day. The weather was beautiful and I sat around and played soccer with all my friends. So far this year God has taught me to look at what's on the bright side. He has also taught me that I need to make an effort to be a better friend. Hope all of you are doing well....That basically means just Mel I guess haha

My morale is still pretty low. Being on jv again has been very humbling and discouraging; however, I am called to rejoice with those that rejoice i.e. my friends that did make varsity. Gosh that's hard seeing that I'm overly jealous. I don't know, I just really need something to pick me up. What am I supposed to say when aunts and uncles ask how my season is going? Do I simply say it's good or do I tell them I'm too embarrassed to talk about it? Writing this post pissed me off. Over and out

Not Happy

I knew it was going to be hard coming into the soccer season this year. My best friends and I would be split up between the varsity and the junior varsity teams. Unfortunately I found myself on the junior varsity side of things and it is killing me! My cousin is the couch and he had to tell me I didn't make the varsity team. That was incredibly embarrassing. The problem is that I was sick during tryouts and our formation only plays one forward which is what it am. That obviously hurts my chances. So while some of my friends are getting all the luxury of varsity, I'm stuck down on jv with my 2 other friends eating their dust. I am hurt and embarrassed but trying to be on the upside. There is still at chance I can be moved up after two weeks if they feel like I have what it takes. So I will give it what I got and pray that I am understanding of what the outcome is.

I'm all packed and looking forward to college life again. I go back tmrw morning to start soccer try-outs. I'm pumped. Just one problem popped up however; I woke up this morning with the flu. Pray I get better before I have to lace up first thing Saturday morning. If I don't feel better, I am going to be in some serious doodoo.

Mold me into something you can fill. And fill me with something real.

Right now I feel like being molded into a shopping bag, or a car to fill with crazy friends.

But Lord maybe a better idea is to let you mold me into a sanctuary, where your presence can be felt.

I have a few quick things to say

I absolutely adore my friends at home. I wish I could see them a lot more though. It is also hard because my friends are in like 3 or 4 different fiend groups. I also love my friends at Calvin and cannot wait until I get to go back :)

Unrelated to that, Matthew 6:24 tells us we can't serve God and money because we will end up loving one and hating the other. Guess which one usually gets the shaft in my life?

Of all the amazing qualities God possesses, I think my favorite is his ability to forgive. That's my favorite because it is one category I fall incredibly short in. I"m moved when I think that God is willing to forgive me for all the ways that I fail him, but I have the hardest time forgiving my friend for something stupid and petty. Lord, your forgiveness completely overwhelms me.
That said, what is your favorite quality of God's? Why?

easier said than done

So I recently got back from camp COW and it was awesome; tiring but awesome. The whole week was about going from luke warm Christians and tuning into believers on fire for Christ. We had a lot of cool speakers and the cabin time was good but there was something missing. The sunday after camp, I went to 2HC and Dave G was speaking about the exact same idea. The thing that was missing was not "what are we supposed to be?" but rather "what steps can we take to achieve that?". This is where I need your help. I always want to do more for Christ but what? What steps can we all take to become believers on fire for Christ? I think we all know what we are supposed to be, but we don't know exactly how to get there.

Into the Hands of the Potter

One of my favorite prayers is to ask God to soften my heart and to mold me into who he needs me to be. That's a good prayer. The problem is once I'm done, I go through my day like nothing happened; maybe because nothing did actually happen. I'm heartfelt in my prayer but in reality, I'm still not ready for God to come and knock down the walls I built up. Instead of letting God mold us, we mold him into the god we need for the day.
The Hebrews called out to God for help. He lead them out of Egypt by splitting water, leading them with a cloud and giving them food and water, yet they still made a cow out of gold. As humans we think we need a god that's tangible, so we make one or mold ours into the god we need. We take advantage of God's love and forget that we need to serve Him and live for Him.
I challenge you to see God for who He is, thank Him for His love, and be open with Him. Then we can start to let down our walls.

Good old Koinonia

I liked our high school youth group. I loved all the people that put it together and of course all the students. However, I always had this feeling like it wasn't what God wanted for me. He wanted more of me. Koin taught me how to pray and how to sing so that people would see God through my actions. The problem was that God wasn't in my motives. There are very few times in my life where I felt challenged in my faith and nun of them come from Koin. Koinonia was cool and comfortable for new comers but I needed more. I needed to be challenged. I was never put out of my comfort zone or encouraged by my peers in my walk with Jesus.
I need to be real with God. I don't have to make my prayers sound good, I just need to be real and to be challenged, because I have gotten too comfortable with where I am.

It's hard for guys to get into the Christian life I think. I blame it on the fact that we don't want to be vulnerable to another male figure, or maybe because we have the need to work for what we are given, like salvation. Either way, it's hard. Guys are prideful and hate the idea of depending on someone else when we want to be in charge. But in charge of what, our lives? I, like most of us, need to be reminded that my life is not my own.

Let's Talk

I really want to have some deeper conversations with my friends but they are hard to start. We don't talk about our faith enough or challenge each other to be more Christ like. I want to be part of a group that cheers each other on in their faith and openly talks about struggles and victories we encounter. There is a difference between judgement and talking to a brother or sister about a problem with the right motives. We need checks and balances in our faith. I feel like we are too scared to even talk the talk, making it impossible to walk the walk.

The perfect night stand

A long time ago I began to understand what it meant to compare myself with Jesus instead of others around me. Understanding it is easy, doing it is way harder. My devos tonight talked about how everyone has a different path, which I think goes along with not comparing ourselves to others. We are all different and God has different paths for each of us. It's easy to be jealous of others but being a Christian was never about easy. We need to celebrate with others and rejoice in our own path as well. Don't wish you had just a little more, or were someone else for a week. God paved the perfect road just for you :)

Fear

     One of my biggest fears is that I will be alone. I like to be by myself a lot but it's only nice to be by myself if it is by choice. It kills me when I find out all my friends hung out and I didn't get the invite. The other night I made plans with a friend and they never came and I still don't know why. I got so mad at them but then I realized the problem was my own. I was alone and afraid they just bailed for no reason. Tonight I was replaying my lonely night when I released something.
     Yes this person bailed on me, but how often do I bail on my prayers? I promise God all the time that He will get my attention at night. Night comes and I find myself watching Iron Chef instead of doing my devotions! Yet God forgives me and listens when I get to him. I'm humbled to think that I live on my time instead of His. I encourage all of you to dive into your relationship with God instead of wasting your time, which is really God's time.

I know this isn't the typical blog post from me but i just have to say it: I HATE INSTAGRAM! I don't understand why people take pictures and grave to turn them yellow! Turning a picture yellow doesn't make it a better picture! Actually take a good shot, use a filter, a real camera, thirds people! Thank you for reading this. Now go and stop trying to be a hipster and defiling photography at the same time.

So I kind of forgot how much I love summer. That said, I LOVE SUMMER! There is nothing better than sitting around and doing everything on my own time. Now I need to use my free time to get into the word a little more. I encourage you guys to do the same, even if time is tight.

Summer Troubles

Summer is around the corner and all I can think about is how busy I'm going to be. I'm so exited to see my ccob friends but to be honest, I'm not gonna be able to spend as much time with you guys and I want. I'm gonna be working a lot and I'm playing soccer most nights. When I do have free time I need to spend it training. In all honesty, the thing I want most right now is to be on varsity next year. I have a good chance but I need to be better. I know that is not where my heart should be but right now that's where it is. So when I'm with you guys, it'll be really nice and if u ask me to hang out, it will make my day even if I can't. This summer won't be that fun but that's life. Love you guys. I want to slack line with Camden, rollerblade with Betsy, eat cookie dough with Mel, have a heart to heart with Maddie and smoke with the Bosses.

Matt Redman - 10,000 Reasons (Bless the Lord)

So I have found an awesome home church away from home. It's called Thornapple and they have a worship leader that sounds like the guy from Mumford and Sons. Anyways the church is awesome, I might like it even more than ccob :O. This is a song we sing a lot and I like it so I thought I'd share it with everyone even though you all have probably heard it already...

habits

Its funny how some habits are hard to stop while others are hard to start. I need to get rid of whats unhealthy in my life and fill it with Christ. I need to stop sitting on Facebook and start getting back into the Word. Devotions takes 5-15 minutes yet I can't seem to find time for it. All my motivation has been toward soccer and worldly things and not towards sharing God's love. Well, time for dorm worship :) c u all in a few weeks

not quite there

So I know some are already out while others are right around the corner but I'm stuck here for a few more weeks so shut up! haha jk but for real, I'm super pumped for summer and reconnecting with my church friends :)

So my mom went to the doctors office. I guess she found something and the doctor told her the only reason she would have it is if it was cancer. Thanks not fun. Well she had to have surgery and somehow she beat the odds. They didn't find anything but this is the second time this year she has had a cancer scare. Obviously scares are better than it being serious but still, she has had her fair share of cancer and cancer scares.

I is who I is who I is

I guess I’m writing this because I don’t know if I should be proud of myself or if it is to be expected. Drinking was always a big deal to me and still is, which explains why I’m writing this. I’m 20 now and only have a year before I can legally drink. I don’t know how serious underaged drinking is, spiritually and socially. And I don’t know why it is such a dig deal to me when God sees it the same as lying to skip class. I think it is because even though God doesn’t have a hierarchy of sins, people do. If I drank and then tried to talk to someone about my faith they wouldn’t take me seriously. If I took an answer off a friends assignment and then talked to someone about Christ, I think they would be fine. I also made a promise to God, my friends, my family, my school and myself that I wouldn’t drink; it’s important for me to keep my promises. So all this said, I am not drinking until I am 21 because...

1. I made a promise
2. It is one way I show my love for my God
3. It tastes bad
4. It helps me witness
5. I’m proud of who I am
6. To show that it’s possible
7. It empowers me
8. To break the social stereotype
9. To not be a hypocrite when I tell my kids not to drink
10. To set an example for anyone that might look up to me
11. To honestly check the “no” box when applying for CampCow staff

ps. It’s easy for me to say no because I’m rarely around it.

My grandma died yesterday. I'm pretty neutral about it

My mom has a good chance of having cancer. She is having surgery a week form today and will find out then. Keep her in your prayers and I'll let u guys know what's up.

God is your judge, not people. Live accordingly.

Skit Guys - God's Chisel

I feel like I'm doing really well spiritually right now which kinda scares me. I have this feeling that God is preparing me for something...something not so fun. God doesn't make bad things happen, he gives us strength to get thru them. Thru our weakness, people will see how strong the God we serve really is.

Tonight I am thanking God for my amazing friends Moose and Dan and our ability to push each other closer to God. But mostly Matthew Joyce and his son Jacob are on my mind. Jacob had a hard week and next month he is having his next big operation so reach out to them and keep them in your prayers. I don't know about you but I'm preparing for rain :)

I just watched Facing The Giants and something really stuck out to me. A guy told a story about 2 farmers that needed rain but only one planted seed. Which one was trusting in God to provide? Without us stepping out in faith and taking a risk, how are we supposed to see God at work in our lives? How much is our faith worth if it isn't an active faith?

Some really cool ideas in this little devotion today.

1. We really need to get out of our comfort zones in order to see God do cool things in us and through us.

2. When we don't think we have enough strength, we may not but it doesn't matter because it's God's amount of strength that matters. And he Always has enough.

I have aways been a pretty non-emotional guy. I like deep conversations and stuff but letting things drag me down hasn't really been my style. This makes it hard for me to understand people that wear their feelings on their sleeves. It's not like either type is better than the other, I just don't know what to do when people are really down about something. Do I give them space do they want to talk about it? Was it something I said or something completely different? Idk, this is bad for a Christ follower to say, but if I'm brutally honest, compassion has never really been my strong suit. I think it's super awkward when people ask me how I feel so I usually just treat people the way I would want to be treated, which is to never talk about it.

wow today is amazing! I'm sure it's the same story everywhere but I thought I'd stop by and tell you.

Voices

There are so many voices telling us what to do and what to believe. Even in silence we can get distracted by voices. We need to learn how to listen to God's voice. It takes a lot of practice and prayer for discernment and still that's only half of it. Once we start to hear him, we need to do what he is telling us and go where he is directing us. It's hard and always needs to be pushed further but that's what it means to walk with the Lord. He promises to be the lamp unto our feet if we let him. Don't be discouraged if your mind wonders off, u fall asleep or simply don't hear him but take time to try. Not once. Not twice. Don't you think he is worth more of your time?

Lady's Man...thats a joke, the only people I know are guys

So my friend wants a girlfriend more than anything. I feel like there is something about winter that makes people pair off and everyone feels the pressure. I'm not gonna lie, a girlfriend sounds nice but it's not like I'm actively looking.

The other day he came in while I was doing my devos and he said something nasty and sexual and I was grossed out but kinda used to it at the same time. But I was convicted. God needs to be my main priority, the one I search for. My friend also needs stop being so nasty but mostly it's that the Lord needs to be the one I long for. Thank you father for challenging me.

School is really dragging but at least I have something to get me to spring break...Mustache March!!!! Mine isn't very good but I'll still be proud to sport a dirty stache ;)

So today is my birthday and I had the pleasure of spending the weekend at home. I had an amazing time with my rents put leaving sucks. I didn't cry or anything but this time was extra hard for some reason. I encountered Mrs. Betsy's mom at church; she and I are best friends now. And I almost ran over mel in my car while she was trying to cross the street in hinsdale. good times

God's timing? This idea that God answers prayers and fixes things in his own time ticks me off. 1. God isn't in time 2. If he sees a problem he can fix by snapping his fingers, why doesn't he?! What's the point of praying for something when he is gonna do whatever he wants, whenever he wants? I mean, he can hear the cries of our souls anyways. How is God love when he lets people suffer? And how can I pray so faithfully for so long with nothing to show for it?

I hope everyone had a good valentines day!! I kept up my 19 strait years of having only my mother as my only valentine but thats ok because she's da bomb. Anyways I hope you guys take the time to read Corinthians 13 and think about the inventor or Love. His love is unfailing unlike ours. So thank him and share his love with those around you :) night everybody

The awkward moment when you reach out to a friend but they never reach back.

There is a time for talking about ur feelings and a time for wanting to be alone but there is also a time for growing up, sucking it in and handling it like an adult. I don't think it's a good idea to always wear ur feelings on ur sleeve.

Take Heart - Hillsong United - Lyrics [HD]

Plane Rides

Plane Rides are great for thinking. I went to Vail and the trip consumed my thoughts but when I was finally in the air and on my way, my mind was back to wondering. Unfortunately the first think that came to mind was summer. Summer sounds great but it comes with a lot of decisions. When do I work, where do I work, do I go to Costa Rica with the soccer team, crap I have to train...hard, what car do I get? Too much to think about on a plane ride to Colorado I think. But then again, what else is a plane ride for?

ps. Vail was beyond amazing. Too awesome to write about via blog.

Fight Club

So a few weeks ago a lot of guys and I were watching the movie "Fight Club." I hear it's a really good movie but it made me really mad. idk I guess I would rather just watch a funny movie or something but it got me thinking...It was about regaining control of your life. Funny because that is what we as Christian are supposed to hand to God. Just remember to put your life fully in His hands and commit to His plans for you, whatever they may be.

p.s. I have a long weekend so I'm flying out to Colorado with my dad and we are gonna grab Brent and show Vail what up. IM PUUUMMMPPPEDDD!!!!!!!! I don't think anyone still reads this but if you do your awesome :)

All of January everyone at Calvin only has one class so we have all day to do whatever we want. Last week I was walking comfortable outside with shorts and a T-shirt but that didn't stop me from going snowboarding. However, we finally got snow and I'm pumped! Im strapping on my board and not planing to take it off until April :)

I was bored so naturally i put on my Selena Gomez pandora station and looked through all my fb pics. I love the people what were and are in my life.

Repeating faces: Betsy, Maddie, Camden, Arce, Allison, Geanna, Elise, Jenna, Pizzello

Awesome Places: TJ, DR, SF, Roca. I love church trips